The Apple tax we all pretend is not there
stepping into the Apple ecosystem is more like a high-end nightclub—expensive at the door, and once inside, you realize even the water is $15. And we have all accepted we will pay 100% tax for it.
Apple wants you to believe that the new iPhone 16 starts at just $800 dollars right? (They say $799 like we will feel its cheaper that way)
A hefty price for the best phone ever made, right? But are you sure? Do you not feel Pro enough to shell our $1,000? Or is your hand not large enough to handle the $1,200 Max Pro (super mega phone).
But even that’s just the cover charge. In reality, stepping into the Apple ecosystem is more like a high-end nightclub—expensive at the door, and once inside, you realize even the water is $15.
Sure, you could get by with the base model, but Apple has designed its game so you inevitably pay more. Need enough storage for all those 4K videos your camera insists on shooting? That’ll be an extra $200 to upgrade from the sad, unusable 128GB base model, or $400 more if you want to go all out.
Wait, want your brand-new, state-of-the-art glass sandwich to survive a single sidewalk mishap? Better buy an overpriced case for $50, which will not stop you from having to tack on AppleCare+ for another $139 per year—because Apple made it nearly impossible to repair without them.
But wait, there’s more! Apple’s free iCloud storage is a hilariously inadequate 5GB, which fills up before you even finish setting up your phone. So, like a responsible digital citizen, you upgrade—and since just your backup is now larger than the 200GB tier you will probably have to go for the 2TB plan for $10 a month. Over a standard three-year iPhone lifespan, that’s another $360 in iCloud rent. And if you ever want to upgrade your phone without transferring everything manually like it’s 2008, you’ll have to pay for this iCloud storage. Apple is literally charging you to move from one iPhone to another. Genius.
By the time you’ve paid the actual cost of ownership over 3 years you’ve spent $1,050 dollars before considering the actual phone that cost you another $1,000.
It's like the boiling frog cruel science experiments. We have been slowly convinced that it is perfectly ok to pay 2.5X the price of the original iPhone (which back in its day was unbelievably expensive) and then pay a 100% tax to use it for 3 years.
This distorted universe does not make sense when companies like CMF can launch well-designed, functional smartphones for $199. That’sless than what you’d pay just for AppleCare on a new iPhone. It’s like realizing your coffee shop loyalty card has been quietly charging you for refills while a guy down the street is handing out espresso shots for free.
And yet, we keep lining up, smiling as we pay our Apple Tax. Because Apple is great at what it does—designing not just beautiful phones, but a world where not upgrading feels like a crime against yourself. And if you ever try to leave? Well, good luck. Your friends will remind you every time they see a green bubble.
